The people and animals you have loved will always be with you. Love doesn't die when the physical body disappears. Love is eternal. It is infinite and never-ending, so our loved ones live inside us for eternity. Without the physical body, the connection is different, and we need to grieve to fully embrace this new way of being with each other. The loss hurts and cuts deep. We want to feel them with our bodies, but we cannot anymore. We also become aware of our own mortality,

The other night, I made an ofrenda for Sally. I put pictures, her favorite toy, peanut butter, and her leash on her doggy bed. She did like that bed! Putting down her leash was especially hard. She loved going for walks. We sat around the ofrenda and read memories I wrote down after she passed away. Once we started talking we remembered many more moments. She was a such a huge part of our lives, a huge part of me. Speaking about memories - here are some. This was April 2019.

Sometimes there are no words - just memories. I find the most comfy spots in every house and own them!! All of them. Sally knew that the towel spot was hers. However, she also liked to be on the non-towel spot when I wasn't looking. ;) Yes, I got spayed. That cone needs to go!! Not my fault. It was rainy outside. The mud just came to me. I like to chill here. So you cannot leave without me. Sally loved playing in the snow, getting her nose in, rolling around in it. No matter

First, you are overwhelmed by its excruciating pain. Then you remember how to breathe again between the waves crushing down on you. Time goes by, and you ask yourself: Am I avoiding the pain, or am I moving forward? Am I working through it, or am I simply functioning with it? I don't think I fully allow myself to feel the pain, the sadness, and the devastation. I am not sure why. It feels too heavy, too full of guilt, too dark to be in it. But not being in it makes me feel di

Dear Sally, Grief is an interesting thing. It has been one year without you. Last night I looked at the memory jar. I created it after you passed. It holds memories of our time together. The last few months are ones I struggle to remember due to my postpartum brain back then. Sally and her favorite place to be Meanwhile, Noah is running circles around us. He is the cutest when he runs. Well, he is the cutest when he does anything. We love him to pieces. Things would be differ

Dear Sally, Your first birthday was on February 11th, 2019. We had been together for almost a full year!!! Can you believe it? All the adventures we had already and so many more to come. I remember that we celebrated with Georgie a few weeks later because his birthday was around that time as well. What a dreamy shot of the two of you!! I am doing better, giving in to the pain more often instead of shutting it down. It sucks, I am telling you, but I feel you again, and that is

Dear Sally, Life has been moving relentlessly forward. We are all doing great!! Noah is crushing it. I hope you are crushing it too!! I know the two of you would have sooooo much fun together. He is already running circles outside and inside the house. His German is more advanced than his dad's, even though he doesn't say many words yet. But he understands everything. Did I mention that we all miss you deeply? I am getting back into writing, and I am hoping to keep it up this

Dear Sally, I am having a hard time writing about our times together. It hurts so much. The grief feels like a heavy rock sitting on my chest. It stops me from feeling the pain. It also stops me from feeling you and what we had. I don't want that. So here it goes, with a heavy heart and teary eyes, let's continue your story. It is November 2018 and you are about to experience your first snow!! It started late at night and came down hard. But no problem for you!! Here are your

This video showed up on my phone the other day. It was 7 months after Sally's first surgery to remove her tumor. She was crushing it!! You didn't know that she was sick. Her initial diagnosis had been devastating. They gave her 3-6 months if we are lucky, even with surgery and chemotherapy. The tumor would come back. We decided against radiation and chemo because of moments like this. I was already pregnant in this video. She stayed with me through my whole pregnancy and got

Dear Sally, Happy Birthday, mein Tiger!! The other morning, Noah dropped pieces of his egg muffin on the floor. I had to think of you. You would have had a blast!! Those muffins are a hit with him, and you would have snatched them up in a second. I miss you so much. It has been too long. The days are harder without you. You brought lightness and laughter into our days, every day. Your presence soothed each moment. I keep looking at your spot on the couch and remember the time

It was hot in August 2018, so we needed to find ways to cool off and have some fun!! I bought a small pool for Sally, and it didn't take her long to figure out what to do. We are loving it!! Then again, this heat...thanking the dog gods for having air conditioning!! What else was going on??? Oh yes, we had a visitor. Sally helped prepare the bed, as you can see, and found it to be very comfortable. And let's not forget to take some fun selfies!! Now, there is the blowout stor

New Friends & Places There are no strangers with a Golden Retriever – only friends!! Whether dogs or humans, you cannot say no to a Golden Retriever. They see you and know right away that you will be their best friend. Sally made friends with Georgie and Chloe. She meet Chloe at Petco's Puppy Time. Nothing better than taking your pup to the pet store and watching her play with other pups. They learn so much, and it brings such joy to watch them interact. Sally's friend Georgi

It is impossible to find my favorite picture for this month!! There are just so many. We had fun exploring the inside and outside of the house. How exciting!! Empty water bottles, mommy's socks and shoes, the sticks in the backyard ( I only chew on them, I don't eat them ), those yellow flower things (a.k.a. dandelions – I do eat them! ) – what an adventure to explore it all. The backyard was in rough shape, and I remember that there were a lot of dandelions. Sally thought it

Let me tell you a story about my quiet soulmate and most wonderful companion for 7.5 years. My heartache is still fresh from her recent passing, and I want to fight that pain badly. I do not want to be without her or plan my days knowing she won’t be part of them. But I am fighting a battle I cannot win. Impermanence is a part of life, and while I can grieve her loss, I cannot undo it. The sadness is overwhelming and numbing at times, so instead of fighting it, let me tell yo